Who needs a job? Dobbs Defense will be hiring.

[twobogie]

So it goes that the time has come for me to need a hand. Sometime in the next month I will be looking to hire a 4-5 day a week guy for the retail shop part of Dobbs. Putting this out there for you guys as ODT has came through for me many times before.

What it is:
Retail gun store position/sales/customer service/general conformity of standardized **** work.
Chance to learn the game and pick up on some insights into my own personal brilliance as well as the already established crew.
Ground level entry position/pivot man in the planned to be growing world of Dobbs Defense/ circle jerk.
Errand boy/gopher
General new guy stuff.

Qualifications:
Ejucation and manners above all
Show respect and expect respect to and from everyone
Strong back
Must wash ass thoroughly and regularly
General decent nature and sense of humor are a must
Clean background and general non-creepiness
Penmanship (yes for real, I need to be able to read everything you write)
Loyalty and dedication. If you don't like your job it won't like you.
Reliable automobile. I have been around long enough to know when you just don't want to come to work
Thick skin. If you can't take some ribbing and occasional verbal abuse you are probably not cut out to work for me.
Flexibility. Sometimes we'll be selling guns, sometimes we'll be scrubbing toilets. I do it too, if you're too good for it, you are probably not cut out to work for me.
Adaptabilty. You need to be fairly intelligent and learn at a reasonable clip and retain what you learn.

Disqualifications:
If you love nothing more than talking religion and politics, you're out.
Sticky fingers. If you steal from me I swear on everything holy that I will seek out a sodomy for hire type to pleasure himself with your anus in a terrible and violent way.
Drugs and alcohol. I know I joke about drugs a lot but cannot tolerate them at work. Also, do as I say not as I do on the alcohol part. What you do on your own time is your business
A vagina. There is no way in hell my wife would ever let me hire a woman to work for me.
Laziness. You won't see anyone else getting nothing done around here.
Chronic masterbators/mad jacking. Nobody ****s 10 times a day and if I catch you beating off at work, you're fired and ridiculed publicly.
Loose lips. You will be required to sign a legally binding confidentiality agreement. Meaning you don't talk about what I'm doing.
Managerial skills and or opinions. I do not need to know how you would do it. Your opinion and input is welcome and valued unless it's not.
If you can't live without texting or your ******ned smartphone then you won't make it here

That's the basics but are in no way the limits. I am easy to work for and my demeanor is generally sound. You will be entering into a group of tightly bonded men who have known each other since birth. There is no drama here.
Think about it, I will start accepting applications(paper or verbal) in the next week or two. Plan to hire in July.
Pay is fair and well above what you'd expect
Hours are 10am-6pm 15 before and after
I am looking for a new team member and not a short term position. Everybody here does everything here and I will expect you to learn over time. We work as a team, somehow we can have six hands on one piece of work and not need to communicate verbally. We just are where we need to be when needed.

Thats about enough for tonight.
Bryan

DAMM; I wish I needed a job. Hope you get the right one.

 

[woodstock]

BTW heres my pic

View attachment 291640

 

[captdave77]

I'm in if you give me a company car. The ole van cant make that trip everyday.

Do the midget hookers come with you?

 

[jimipanic]

Good luck with your new employee.

Hiring new guys is hard, I am in the middle of hiring 3 and firing one.

Been there done that..
As they say, its so hard to find good help nowadays...

 

[AKguy]

Can I take smoke breaks, but instead use them to masturbate in my car?

 

[Rolan_Kraps]

I wish I could afford the pay cut. Sounds like my time of environment.

 

[Nonliberal]

BTW heres my pic

View attachment 291640

Disqualified!

Can I take smoke breaks, but instead use them to masturbate in my car?

Sounds fair. 3 a day enough for you?

 

[Nonliberal]

I wish I could afford the pay cut. Sounds like my time of environment.

I'm getting that a lot. Unfortunately, that is the nature of the beast for a lot of people. It's not bad money for the type of job it is but it's also not a high end position.

 

[AKguy]

Sounds fair. 3 a day enough for you?

I was thinking more like 6 or 7. Or, you can provide me with a company paid for hooker and some penicillin.

 

[captdave77]

You missed the biggest benefit of working for Dobbs.