Question for LEO\lawyers about contacting a Sheriff, who’s my estranged brother

[Tactical Beaver]

Cliff notes, will try to be unbiased.

My brother is an assistant Sheriff, been in law enforcement for 25ish years.

IMHO, he’s become a tyrant but that’s subjective and my personal opinion.

My family are all good people, most with honorable military service.

Only one of my other brothers has a violent felony record, not me, and no one else in my family.

With the exception of this one brother, none us us have even a traffic citation in at least 20+ years.

I got a ticket 20 years ago for tinted windows.

That’s it.

My “cop” brother cut our entire family off about 7-8 years ago because of a disrespectful conversation he had with my mother.

Things he said to her, I will not tolerate.

In fairness, I said some pretty nasty things. All true, but still nasty.

Because of this, he hasn’t spoken to any of our family in almost 8 years.

Not that I need to defend my actions, I’d like to be the bigger man and apologize and try to reestablish comms and ultimately have my brother back, with whom I love.

Blood is blood in my book.

He has also NO clue the devastation he’s caused our mother!

With that said, I’ve tried to reach out over the years with responding threats that he’d have me arrested for harassment ect ect ... hence tyrant attitude.

I was extremely rude and disrespectful when this all started, but have been nothing but respectful, cordial, and nice ever since.

I’ll also point out, during his threats towards me for contacting him, never ONCE has he specifically asked, requested, or demanded any type of “no contact”

Sorry y’all for a long, TMI, prelude so here’s my question....

For weeks, I’ve been contacting his agency to see if I can speak with him.

I’ve been told everytime that he’s unavailable.

I’ll call everyday until he communicates with me.

Being a public servant, I have that right as long as I stay within the law of that state/county, correct?

 

[palmettomoon]

Not that I need to defend my actions, I’d like to be the bigger man and apologize and try to reestablish comms and ultimately have my brother back, with whom I love.

You will not profit from this action. I'm speaking from experience.

Brother was a cop for 25 years. Constant drain on the finances of the family. All of us. Except my baby brother. They had a schism in college when copbro threw keys at my mom in from of my baby bro. (I was away in military college)

It took me twelve years of lobbying and cajoling to get them to talk to each other and finally get together.

What does copbro do when he visits baby bro? Asks to borrow money.

No. Good. Deed. Ever. Goes. Unpunished.

 

[WileyX585]

You will not profit from this action.

Sometimes the hardest things in life are the most necessary. I've been through this with some of my family, and as bad as it sucks its a decision I will stand by.

OP I understand your desire to reconnect with family, and though this post may not help much I wish you the best in your dealings. Family is a funny beast.

 

[palmettomoon]

I'd leave sleeping dogs lay. He sounds like he's too good for y'all anyway. I feel bad for your mom though.

 

[basstracker89]

Sorry for your situation. Unfortunately these things happen. Maybe he could at least go see your Mom. You do need to stop contacting him, that is a form of harassment as he has told you not to. I know it's difficult.
You are right. I'm going through similar situation. It's their loss

 

[Boogar Presley]

Oldest brother is that way. He was rude to our mother, accused her, me and my youngest brother(special needs) of disrespecting him and cut everyone off. I miss him but that was his choice, his emotions to work out. He only has contact with our other brother. Everybody's got their own life and their own problems to deal with, adults should realize this

 

[Pathfinder5243]

I have found it rather easy to cut people from my life wether that be family or friends who no longer grow you, support you or respect you.

Let the bridges I burn light my way in the dark.

 

[outlaw1961]

Blood is thicker than water but it is usually a family member that makes the most trouble for you. If you have tried numerous times for reconciliation it is time to let it go. The ball is in his court now.

 

[sambo77]

Good on you for trying to make amends. I will tell you from my experience it isn't worth it. My wife's brother is the same way. Might even be a little bit worse, because of some of the things he has done. We attempted to make amends with him and move on but ultimately it didn't work. Both parties not only have to be willing to make it work but also admit their own faults. It seems you have by what you've said in your post. He doesn't seem willing to do that. I know it's cold and a hard pill to swallow but if he isn't gonna be decent it isn't worth the future hurt he will bring to the family.

 

[Rimfire rifleman]

I too have dealt with similar situation in my family, it seems some people never grow to be adults. I expect that your attempts & his denials for contact just somehow justify his actions to him This is the childish way some people think about even their mother’s pain. It’s the “I’ll show them” attitude.