I understand the concern, but I would totally remove that board, cut a vertical piece, and hang it on a wall with bow string.
I have a bench I made 40 yrs. ago, that has a musket ball imbedded in it that is visible on the top of the seat.
Honestly I thought the raccoon with the pins was suppose to be imitating him getting hit with quills and you used pins because people would not be able to not touch them.
Though not as pesky or numerous (but potentially worse results) watch out for TICKS also. I found another one crawling on my head from just being in the yard, cutting okra, and moving some stuff around. Probably the 7th or 8th this year. I just rubbed my neck and head twice writing this. Dang.
So, what I'm reading is you buy your wife this amazing Kitchen Aid Mixer (probably a deal for under $200 for Black Friday) and then you procure the all stainless part and both of you are happy. Pick the color she would like best - it will grind the same.