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THIS IS HOW BAD IT IS OUT THERE...

These stories remind me of a joke.
In a local pizza shop, a man ordered a pizza pie and the waitress asked him if he wanted it cut in six or eight pieces and after thinking the question over for a few seconds, replied—“you better cut it into six pieces for I don’t think I could eat eight!”
 
My bags get reused over and over, and then their final demise is dog turd cleanup.

Hell, when I used to go on business trips to Jamaica or DR, I am always convinced these 3rd world islands don't reuse their plastic bags- they just dump them and every other piece of trash into the beautiful blue waters.

India and China are way worse.
 
It's been my experience that when you have a total of say, $14.63 and you hand them a twenty dollar bill and 13 cents, they'll almost always now hand me the 13 cents back and say, "You gave me too much money." instead of giving me the $5 bill and the two quarters I wanted in change.

LOL!

So I'm in Kroger, which has a notice at every cash register, "DUE to COIN SHORTAGE ........"

Total was $19.37. I handed her a $20 bill. She asked if I had exact change. I dug around in my pocket and found a quarter, a dime and 2 pennies, which I handed her.

She very efficiently range up the amount tendered, $20.37, and counted out 4 quarters change. I told her, "you're the one with the coin shortage, not me, don't you have a 1 dollar bill?" and you could see the perplexed look and the wheels turning - and she no doubt was a student of some sort.
 
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300 worth of groceries while the employee that wants $15 an hour "monitors" and then this happened.
Her - why are you double bagging all of your groceries?
Me - excuse me?
Her - you are wasting our bags!
Me - if you don't like the way I'm bagging the groceries, feel free to come on over here and bag them yourself.
Her - that's not my job!
Me - okay, then I will bag my groceries how I please if that's all right with you.
Her - why are you using two bags?!
Me - because the bags are weak and I don't want the handles to break or the bottoms to rip out.
Her - well that's because you are putting too much stuff in the bag. If you took half of that stuff out and put it in a different bag then you wouldn't need to double bag.
*10 seconds of me just staring at her.
Me - so you want me to split these items in half and put half of them in a different bag so that I don't have to double bag.
Her - exactly.
Me - so I would still be using two bags to hold the same number of items.
Her - no because you wouldn't be double bagging.
*me pressing two fingers to my left eye in an attempt to make it stop twitching.
Me - okay so here I have a jug of milk and a bottle of juice double bagged. If I take the milk out and remove the double bagging and just put the milk in the single bag and the juice in that single bag I'm still using two bags for these two items.
Her- no because you are not double bagging them so it's not the same number of bags.
*me looking around at about 10 other customers who at this point are enjoying the show.
Me- is this like that Common Core math stuff I keep hearing about?
Her- never mind you just don't get it.
And with that she went back to her little Podium so she could continue texting or playing games on her phone or whatever it was she was doing before she decided to come over and critique my bagging skills.


This post should definitely be on the ODT hall of fame ballet for sure!
 
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