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Do You Feel Old

Don’t get me started. I’ve been a lineman for the largest phone company in the world for going on 32 years. It wears your body out. 3 right shoulder surgeries, 4 knee surgeries and a titanium knee. Lower back fused from L5 to S1. Carpal tunnel surgeries both hands. Un-countable cuts and stitches. Been knocked out, knocked off poles, fallen off poles, dislocated shoulders and elbows. I wake up every morning feeling like someone snuck in to my room and beat the s*#t out of me with a baseball bat. Funny thing is if I had it to do all over again I wouldn’t change a thing.

side note;
Suffered with gout for about 10 years. It flared up about twice a year. Worst pain in the world. If wind blew on it I wanted to cry like a baby. Same treatment every time. When in to my doctor during an episode and they had a new PA. He asked if I had ever been prescribed Allopurinol. Nope, never had. He wrote me a script and I have never had it since. One little white pill every mourning with my caffeine has changed my life.
bookmarked :thumb: My big toes get to burning/stinging a couple times a year. I've cut back on tomato but not red meat .
 
Kidney stones are bad, I've had several blown up. The largest was 12 mm, it was stuck spinning cutting and looked like Jason was inside me with his machete when I peed. I have neuropathy in my legs now and it's really bad, imagine being poked with hundreds of dull needles at once, and numbness so bad it's hard to balance myself walking at times. But thank the Lord I'm still here, and every day is a blessing.
 
Spent couple of decades at the phone company but didn't get to climb poles. Good Lord that was a tough job. Thanks for your service when universal service meant something. On the stone note you are correct. Last time 15MM had to be laser beamed. That was an adventure I never want to repeat. Getting old sux but the alternative ain't so good either.
It’s because of guys like you and the customers that I’m still with the phone company. When we got bought out in 07’ it went to hell in a hand basket.
Back to the subject (ouch) at hand. My last one happened when my teenage daughter was the only one at home. I’m wailing like a blue tick on a coon trail, she’s freaking out, and I’m begging her to drive me to the ER. New driver. 1998 Dodge 1500 lifted about 6” with 35’s. She’s driving like granny on Beverley Hill Billies. I’m screaming. Before cell phones. I finally get there and in a room. One shot of Demerol and I’m feeling bullet proof. I called the nurse, said I got to go to the little boys room. Nope, pee in that little container. Nope, can’t do it. Sorry, got to. (Begging) Please..... I can’t. Ok, but I got to walk you. No problem. If it starts moving again, I can’t hold you up. No problem, pains gone. Half way to the toilet, about 10 feet into the hallway, kid stone decides to go for a walk down my urethras. I go limp, fall on top of the nurse, (about 5’ 105lbs) and we both hit the deck. As we’re laying there on the floor, she looks at me and in a very calm voice says, “you promised me you wouldn’t do that.”
 
I hear you. After my laser procedure first thing after i woke up they wanted me to go pee. Still groggy nurse took me to toilet. Left me alone and I went. Bloody hell fire breathing nut buster. She said if I had told you how bad it was you would have never gone. That is one truth I will never wish on anyone. Every piss for next 24 hours was rocky hell.
 
Don’t even get me started man....

Screw it, Ima tell it anyway.
I’ve had the kidney stones too, I’m in the hotel with the wife getting dressed up for my 10 year high school reunion in ‘87 and all of a sudden it felt like Andre the Giant grabbed me by my right side and I went straight to my knees. Wound up in the hospital, had a brand new treatment using sound waves to bust the stones, doc busted the stones alright but busted a small hole in an artery but didn’t see it. Went home, 3 days later I go for a follow up with the doc and got rushed back to the hospital where I stayed 19 days and damn near bled out internally. Right kidney shut down with a blood clot surrounding it. Had to lay as still as possible so the clot would dissolve and not cut another artery. Took over six months to recover from that.
I’ve had numerous concussions, first time I was 12 playing kill the man with the ball. Caught a pass and got clipped from behind and landed on my neck & head.
I’ve broken every knuckle on both hands, most of the fingers, a few toes. Broken ribs, my wrist, my ankle and 5 years ago at 56 years old literally broke my right leg to pieces on my motorcycle and didn’t even crash, ain’t that some ****. lol Got loose leaving a gas station when I hit a wet spot, in the process of getting control of the bike the doc said my foot had to have spun around at least 220 degrees. Spiral fractures in the tibia & fibula right below my knee. The top of the tibia was in about 20 pieces, split like a piece of firewood, cracked down the front, fibula snapped about an inch from the top & tore all the cartilage apart in the knee. Doc said it was the worst damage he’s ever seen to have not crashed. Got myself a custom made titanium plate & 7 big ol’ screws holding it together now. Doc also said it was bad enough that if I had done it 5 years earlier it would’ve been unfixable and they would’ve amputated it above the knee, thank God I still got it even if it is crooked as hell. Lol!
Top pic shows the fibula is still broken after surgery, probably why my leg is crooked now. Shows the 37 staples before they took em’ out too. Next pic shows 3 screws together at the top, 1 angled up & 3 more below.
2 1/2 months laid up before I could start therapy, six months of therapy and I was back in the saddle again while still using a cane to walk with.

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I’ve herniated 3 discs in a row in the middle of my back, 1 about 4” below those, 1 in my neck and the L5/S1 in the lower back. No surgery but had the nerve block on the 3 discs bout 2 years ago and doing fairly well with that but about 2 months ago I aggravated the L5/S1 and pinched the sciatic nerve. Now I have pain from my right ass cheek all the way to my foot and my foot has this weird tingling feeling going on. Gotta have new MRI’s done so I can get the nerve block done there, good thing I didn’t get rid of my cane. Damn ass & leg will get a sharp pain like lightning hit me numerous times a day & night if I move the wrong way. Man, I can’t wait to get that nerve block done!
I could go on and on with other surgeries & injuries but I’m getting bored & tired. Now I gotta get a CT scan of my lungs, I think my PCP thinks I might have cancer. Yippee kiyay mutha****ers! Like MuleShoe MuleShoe said...Getting old ain’t for sissies that’s for sure!
I tried to tell y’all not to get me started, gotta blame all this bitching on somebody. Lol!
 
Tazz for the win. Damn!!!
Do I get a prize? Lol!

Yep. You get the prize Taz. You made my bung hole pucker about 3 times. Love the pics.
Some prize, huh? Haha! You know the rules, pics or it didn’t happen. :nono: :twitch: :pound:


I keep asking my bride, “ how old you gotta be before you can say, I’m too old for this shat?”
I started falling apart at 35. I worked hard and played even harder. Didn’t believe my Dad & Granddad, they tried to tell me all that crap would catch up to me but I thought I was 10 ft tall & bulletproof. Oh yeah, I “knew it all” too. Lol! If I knew I’d live this long I might’ve taken better care of myself......Riiiiiiiight. Aaaaaaahahahaha!!! :lol:
 
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