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Cab driver

Man tells his pychiatrist he has recently been having suicidal thoughts.
Asks the dr. what he should do about this.
Doctor replies "first thing you should do is start paying for your
sessions in advance".
 
A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in New York City .
The cab driver, an old Jewish gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman.
He made no attempt to start the cab. The woman glared back at him and said,
"What's wrong with you, honey? - Haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?"
The old Jewish driver answered, "Let me tell you sumsing, lady I vasn't staring at you like you tink; det vould not be proper vair I come from."
The drunk woman giggled and responded, "Well, if you're not staring at my boobs,
sweetie, what are you doing then?" He paused a moment, then told her.
"Vell, M'am, I am looking and I am looking, and I am tinking to myself 'Vair in da hell is dis lady keeping de money to pay for dis ride?
No that's funny!
 
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